Why I Like Walmart

The crowds suck. Their business ethics suck. The customer service sucks. They do have good prices, but often the products they sell aren't even worth those ultra low prices. (Van Damme quadruple-feature DVD for only $9? Wow. But wait, it's 4 Van Damme movies.) So why would I claim to like Walmart when a majority of educated folks claim that Walmart is the root of all evil? I've seen the documentary on how they have destroyed small businesses. Has my new mediocre school dumbed me down that much? Maybe, but I've liked Walmart even before I got here.

Here in Indiana there are four places to shop for groceries. We've got Bi-Lo, Giant Eagle, Martin's, and Walmart. Out of these four, three have a special club that you have to join in order to get discounts or special prices. Guess which store doesn't. That's right, Walmart. Walmart doesn't ask me for my name, address, phone number, email, etc., just so I can pay a reasonable price for milk. There is no Advantage Card or Bonus Buy Club that tracks my spending habits and then sells that info to marketers or advertisers.

Now this isn't just the case here in Indiana. When I visit family in Ohio, the same thing happens there. I buy a bag of chips and they ask for my Kroger Card.

"I don't have one."

"Then these chips are $7.95 instead of $2.50."

"Why?"

"Because you don't have our card."

"Can I get one?"

"Sure. Just fill out these pages, let me see your ID, give me a urine sample, and put your thumbprint right there."

It was like that in Vegas as well. Albertsons had a card. Vons had a card. Smith's had a card. Fuck 'em all. When I hear about a supermarket going out of business because they just can't compete with Walmart, I get a warm feeling in my heart. Good riddance. I don't want to give you my info, and I sure as hell don't want to join a club just to buy a loaf of bread! I'll shop at Walmart and I'll sleep just fine at night. The supermarkets can't go out of business fast enough!