Friday, April 27, 2007

Slang Project - Entry No. 85

quail pipe, n., a woman's tongue

Taken from Nathan Bailey's Canting Dictionary, 1736. This book was published in London in 1737 and collected and defined language used by thieves, cheats, convicts, highwaymen, and other morally dubious characters.

Thursday, April 26, 2007

Double Standard

According to MySpace's Terms & Conditions for usage, hate speech is not allowed on their site. An excerpt:

Content/Activity Prohibited. The following is a partial list of the kind of Content that is illegal or prohibited to post on or through the MySpace Services. MySpace.com reserves the right to investigate and take appropriate legal action against anyone who, in MySpace.com's sole discretion, violates this provision, including without limitation, removing the offending communication from the MySpace Services and terminating the Membership of such violators. Prohibited Content includes, but is not limited to Content that, in the sole discretion of MySpace.com:
  1. is patently offensive and promotes racism, bigotry, hatred or physical harm of any kind against any group or individual

You can read all their policies here: http://www.myspace.com/Modules/Common/Pages/TermsConditions.aspx

However, groups like **Fuck the KKK** (Group URL: http://groups.myspace.com/thekkksucks), International Anti-Nazi Organization (Group URL: http://groups.myspace.com/iano), and I Hate Racists (Group URL: http://groups.myspace.com/nocolor) are allowed to exist on MySpace with impunity. I sent a couple of emails to Tom and the staff pointing out these hate sites that were in violation of their policy but they are all still up. The only one that was taken down was the fourth one I pointed out to them: -The final solution-(neo-nazi organization) (Group URL: http://groups.myspace.com/finalsolutionnazis). It disappeared later the same day. Try going to this group's site and see for yourself.

My point is not that I'm a racist but that I believe in equality for ALL, not just some. If MySpace does not allow hate speech, then NO group that promotes hatred of another group of people should be allowed.

I realize that this site belongs to MySpace and it is up to their "sole discretion" as to what promotes hatred, but I think it is representative of a major flaw in the culture at large. In school, on the television, in the news, etc., we are repeatedly pounded with the idea that we must be tolerant of others. We may not agree with them, but it is simply "different strokes for different folks" and we must accept that. However, anyone who is intolerant will not be tolerated! That's the big exception to the rule and it seems everyone is comfortable with that. Isaiah Washington has been chastised and shunned by his fellow actors. Tim Hardaway was banned from NBA All-Star activities. Imus was fired from radio. Is it just me or does anyone else feel that there is something really wrong here? This is not tolerance that the culture is preaching; it is something else. Something twisted and intolerant.

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Not only did they give me a degree...

UNLV also sent me this email. Can you spot the stupidity?

UNLV Senior Adult Theatre Program Presents "The Monodrama Project" May 23-27

The UNLV Senior Adult Theatre Program presents "The Monodrama Project," 10-minute, original one-person shows written by the playwright, at 8 p.m. May 23-26 and at 2 p.m. May 27 in the Paul Harris Theatre, located in the Alta Ham Fine Arts Building on the UNLV campus. Tickets are $5 and available at the UNLV Performing Arts Center Box Office or by calling 895-ARTS (2787).

Silly-willy school, plays are always written by the playwrights. Three cheers for the alma mater.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Slang Project - Entry No. 84

cat-heads, n., a woman's breasts

Taken from the book 1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue by Francis Grose et al.

Monday, April 23, 2007

103 Questions

One of those stupid survey bulletins that people post. Thought I'd give it a try today. You may notice that there are not 103 questions here, but that's the way it came to me. Fucking surveys...
103 Questions People Wouldn't Ask

001. When's the last time you ran?
About half an hour ago; I-- keeps me running all day.

002. Do your jeans have rips, tears, and holes in them?
Not really, unless you count the bottoms.

003. What are you reading right now?
Dante's Purgatorio.

004. Do you celebrate 4/20?
Fifth Amendment.

006. Favorite ice cream?
Daiquiri Ice

007. When was your last doctor's visit?
A few weeks ago

008. Do you get the full 8 hours of sleep a night?
Not usually.

010. "First Loves Are Never Over;" is this true for you?
I don't know; depends on my mood.

011. Think of all your exes. Would you take any of them back?
In a second just so I could get away from my current.

012. If anyone came to your house on your "lazy days" what would they find you wearing?
Boxers & a t-shirt

014. Have you ever been on your school's track team?
Yes.

015. Do you own a pair of Converse?
Yes.

017. Do you eat raw cookie dough?
Yes!

018. Have you ever kicked a vending machine?
Yes, and I'm proud to say I've done a lot worse to one also. But I never had sex with one if that's what you're thinking.

019. Last text message was from whom, and when?
Today from B---.

020. What are you doing right now?
Taking this survey. Ha, ha. Betcha never heard that one a million times.

021. Do you watch Trading Spaces?
No, I'm not fucking retarded.

022. How do you eat your Oreos?
Don't like Oreos although sometimes I'll eat the icing and throw the cookie away.

023. Have you ever stayed online for a very long time waiting for someone?
No, but I've stayed online for a very long time waiting to cum...but we've all done that.

024. Are you cocky?
Sometimes...especially if I've been drinking.

030. Could you live without a computer?
Yes.

031. Do you wear your shoes in the house?
No.

033. At what age did you find out that Santa wasn't real?
Fuck! About 20 seconds ago.

034. In your house- How many house phones:
4 and I've never answered a single one of them.

035. What do you do when you're sad?
Replace the lightbulb in the garage.

036. Who would you call first if you won the lottery?
Nobody because I hate the phone. I would leave my wife though!

037. Last time you saw your best friend?
A few days ago.

040. Who or what sleeps with you?
A--- and occassionally a baby or three.

041. Are you/have you ever been in love?
I have been in the past.

042. Pancakes or french toast?
Fench toast

043. How do you like your eggs?
Scrambled with cheese

044. Are you in high school?
No.

045. Is anyone on your bad side right now?
Oh yes! But don't worry, if you can read this then it is not you.

046. What jewelry are you wearing?
Does a cockring count?

047. What's the first thing you do when you get online?
Check email.

049. Do you watch Grey's Anatomy?
No.

050. How do most people spell your name?
Correctly.

051. Would you wear a boy/girlfriends clothes?
I do.

054. Where do you work?
All of me works except I do wear glasses.

056. What are you doing tomorrow?
Class. Maybe a vending machine.

057. Is Justin Timberlake becoming the next Michael Jackson?
How the fuck would I know?

058. Favorite name for a girl?
Ixy

059. Favorite name for a boy?
Ixy

060. Will you keep your own last name when you get married?
Yes, I did.

061. Your favorite restaurant you don't get to eat much at?
DeStefano's.

062. When is the last time you left your house?
Yesterday.

066. How do you eat your steak?
Medium

067. Do you return your cart?
Yes.

069. Do you have a dishwasher?
Yes, she's 10.

070. What noise do you hear?
Baby crying

071. Would you survive in prison?
Probably not.

072. Next concert you hope to go to?
Neil Young.

073. What was the last thing you ate?
A Triscuit.

075. Who is the youngest in your family?
S--.

076. If all of your friends were going on a road trip, who would be most likely to over pack?
J----.

077. Do you know anyone with the same name as you?
Yes. And people call him Brett.

078. How many pairs of shoes do you own?
4 or 5.

080. When is the last time you ate peanut butter?
I don't know.

082. What's for dinner?
Pasta

083. What's the last thing you purchased?
Gas.

084. Do your siblings ever pay for stuff for you?
No.

087. What brand are your pants right now?
Hanes.

088. Ever been to Georgia?
Yes. Even have relatives there!

089. Did you do breakfast this morning?
No.

090. Do you like marshmallows?
Yes, and I love to roast.

091. What irritates you most on the internet?
Surveys that are deceptively titled "103 Questions People Wouldn't Ask" when there are less than 80 actual questions!!

092. What brand is your digital camera?
Sony

093. Do you watch movies with your parents?
No.

096. What song best describes your life right now?
I have no clue

097. Do you own expensive perfume/cologne?
Ha.

098. Are you taking college classes right now?
Yes.

101. Do you like sushi?
Yes.

102. Do you get your hair cut every month?
Nope, but I just did last week.

103. Do you go online everyday?
Almost. I'd definitely get online more often though if people would send me more surveys because that's exciting!

There! Feel free to take the survey yourself and post the results as a comment. Also be sure to send it to all your friends so they can read your answers and then take it themselves. If we work together, we can change the world through our conscientious survey taking!

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Button, button. Who's got the button?

In a newer elevator I found:


I need to know what it does! Could it be that we've harvested the power of mother nature? Would it drop California into the sea? Am I on Candid Camera? I so wanted to push it, but I am already responsible for one earthquake (don't ask) and I don't think my conscience could handle a second one. Still, if anyone's bored and wants to go on a short field trip with me...

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Slang Project - Entry No. 83

redd up, v., to clean or put things in order; to tidy up

(Comes from northern WV, eastern OH, and western PA area slang)